10 commandments to self-love
1. I shall lovingly accept myself as I am right now: You are unique. There is no other person like you. Embrace your uniqueness. All of us have flaws and that makes us human. There is no point in striving for perfection as this puts extra pressure on yourself. Social media is the main course of this, as many people view images and stories. Some people may feel envious whilst viewing the images of events their friends have attended. We need to learn to be happy with who we are and realize that people only portray the “perfect” moments. Nobody ever talks about their flaws. Which is why this should give us all the more reason to embrace our uniqueness.
2. I shall appreciate all the beauty that makes me who I am:
• Physical beauty: Appreciate your natural beauty without make up to enhance your features. After all natural beauty is always the best. Whilst there is nothing wrong with make-up however do not let it consume your life and be the main reason for your boost in self-esteem. You need to be comfortable in your own skin as there is no one quite the same as you are.
• Inner beauty: This is your ability to portray kindness to yourself. As well as to others. Always remember kindness and self-love starts with yourself. Having goals, visions and the determination to achieve all that you set out for yourself. Believing in yourself and knowing that you need to enjoy the journey of life whilst working on your ambitions. Never quit when the going gets tough.
3. I shall regularly give thanks for all of my blessings: It is important to show gratitude for everything in your life however big or small it may be. Being grateful for the gift of life is one of the greatest blessings. Some days you may wake up sad and like you are unable to take on the day. This is perfectly normal. When you experience these days why not think of the things you have in your life that you are grateful for? Some examples include: Being grateful that you woke up today, you can hear the birds outside and you are able to see the sky (these basics things can be taken for granted, imagine losing your eye sight and hearing. How would you feel?). These are little things to be grateful for however there are plenty more.
4. I shall trust in my ability to take care of myself: If you don’t take care of yourself then who will? Take care of your emotions. Always accept and analyze what you are feeling and thinking. Understand why you are feeling a certain way. Reach out to people who care about you and who you can trust in opening up to. After all we are human beings and we experience many emotions and we need to feel it. We also need human interaction so why not reach out to someone who you can trust and is non judgmental. Sometimes speaking about what you are feeling helps deal with what you are currently going through because if you don’t deal with your emotions; depression, anger and resentment can develop.
Take care of your hygiene. Sometimes when life gets busy a common factor people tend to neglect is their their hygiene. For example: Forgetting to bath, shave, wash clothes, untidy home. When this happens it becomes a clear indication that you need to pause and reflect on the reasons for neglecting your hygiene.
Take care of your health (Physical and mental health): Have a balance diet, exercise regularly, have a good circle of friends and making time for self-care is essential (Read previous blog post on the importance of self-care).
5. I shall not criticize myself: One of the most common reasons I see on a daily basis which contributes towards a low self-esteem is self-criticism. You need to be careful of how this affects you if it continuously leaves you feeling low and negative then you are being hard on yourself. Remember you are trying your best.
6. I shall not criticize others: Don’t criticize others as you never know how it may affect their emotions. Some people who have a low self-esteem really take everything to heart. These people look for self-approval continuously. So we need to be mindful of this every time you criticize another person.
7. I shall forgive myself when I make a mistake: You are only human and you are bound to make mistakes so do not be overly hard on yourself. What truly matters is that you learn from your mistakes and try not to repeat it again.
8. I shall be kind to others without sacrificing my own needs: Whilst being kind to others plays a pivotal role however it should not come at a price which is YOURSELF. If you feel like something may harm you then do not do it, because you are the most important person in your life.
9. I shall take responsibility for my life: By taking responsibility it gives you the power and control to know that it is your life and that you can do anything you desire. However with saying that, taking responsibility is something many of us fear as we prefer to blame others for mistakes, misunderstandings and arguments but by taking responsibility it also makes one mindful of the things they say and do.
10. I shall love myself to the best of my ability: Love yourself in every possible way. Value yourself and know your worth. Never settle for anything less than you deserve.